Week 10

Well holy crap I just realized that I've had this blog for 10 weeks already and that means I should be doing really good at losing weight right? Definitely not. I've been getting very discouraged about the fact that I've at the most lost 5 pounds in over two months. It is not very encouraging but I'm really trying to work on it.

My biggest problem I think is self sabotage. I will workout good for a little while and then totally just stop because I'm tired or lazy. Same thing with my eating. I'll eat good for a little bit and then binge on Taco Bell and pizza (case in point, Sunday). I also suck at having self control when it comes to drinking. I've been really bad about that lately as well. I feel like I'm grasping at straws to try anything to keep my motivated and on the right path but I feel like I'm not really finding it anywhere or in anything. I also need to keep doing things consistently and I think I would be doing so much better than what I have been in the last month or so. It's coming down to crunch time about my vacation so I either need to really focus now or I'll never get to where or what I want to be.

Bored on a Friday night

So I'm sitting here Skyping with the bf all sweaty and smelly from the gym. What an exciting life I lead since it's a Friday night. Go me for going to the gym even though I did not feel like it and not going out and boozing it up. I could really go for some pizza or chips right now though good thing neither of those are in my room haha. This is really just a random post because I felt like it.

One thing that has been bothering me is my lack of motivation lately. How do I keep it up because I feel like nothing I'm doing is really making that big of a difference. It's so depressing. I need to have friends that drag me to the gym like I did tonight. It helped. Thanks Julie!

P.S. I started the Two Hundred Sit Ups and One Hundred Pushups program tonight.......Hopefully I can actually stick with something.

Body Envy

Lauren Conrad looks amazing........maybe I will look like this too......one can only dream. And also no I don't know why she has 24 written on her, I can't remember where I stole this picture from sorry!

Weigh In Wednesday

So I swear unless the scale in the gym changed drastically from Monday night I've lost like 2.5 pounds to be at 141.5 pounds. That's just crazy I mean seriously. Probably all just water weight and I didn't eat very good today so damn.

So my big problem I have decided is consistency. Please anyone let me know how to stay consistent with my workouts I feel like everytime I go to the gym I just do random things and it doesn't add up to anything that creates results. I think a big issue too is that I just need to drastically reduce calories as well. UGH trying to lose weight just really sucks. I know that I'm worth it though. I deserve to look amazing on my vacation and I'm not going to do that by avoiding the gym like I did tonight and eating chocolate instead. Damn it............

I will go tomorrow though. I'm trying to slowly get back into running because I've been out of it for so long. 20 minutes on the treadmill felt like torture on Tuesday though so I think the key is for me to run outside. It keeps it a little more interesting right? Too bad the air is so polluted that it's like smoking a pack a day even though I don't. I will probably leave Kosovo with a black lung but all in the name of running outside right?

I'm seriously considering buying a Bodybugg or something like it because it is so hard for me to judge the amount of calories I'm eating and burning in a day. It would definitely help with weight loss for sure. $150 though.............why can't I just naturally be skinny and in shape. My genetics suck I'll blame it on that and not the beer I drink.

Short term goals for next week for the Spring Shape Up Challenge:
Lose 1 pound
Drink 2 liters of water per day
Continue with my food journaling (this was a random thing I started in the last week and it seems to be helping a lot)
Resist the urge to eat all the chocolate in my room
Do cardio 4-5 times, weight training 2-3
Find something that is going to keep me motivated to lose weight.

Food Journal

I have been journaling all my food intake since Friday. It has been extremely interesting to see what I eat everyday and how much! I know I am a lot more conscious of what I'm eating because I have to write it all down. I was really bad this weekend and didn't want to write it all down but it was like I was playing a mental game with myself. I mean why not write it down? I already know what I ate, it's like if I actually wrote it down it would become real. Very strange.

Tomorrow is Weigh In Wednesday for the Spring Shape Up Challenge. I'm really hoping that I'm down a pound. I guess I'll find out when I drag myself to the gym in the morning to weigh myself.

Week 9

So I have decided that I've given up on my scale that I bought about two months ago because the thing is completely cracked out. It's crazy. I am officially using one at the gym and it is telling me I weigh slightly less than I thought so I am totally ok with that. I weighed in at 144 today. That makes me excited. I have been eating and drinking like a mad woman lately so any kind of loss is ok. So just so we all know, I'm officially using a different scale but it seemed like it was pretty comparable. Of course it would only be me that has scale drama going on every Monday morning.

I went to Skopje, Macedonia again yesterday and I had McDonald's. I just had to because it's delicious and AMERICAN. I miss all the good ol' American foods. That could explain why I'm a chubby girl now working on losing all that good American food. Totally not the point though because I got McDonald's and didn't have to wear my uniform. Life was good.

I must confess on Saturday night I drank entirely too much too much. I'm so proud of myself because I've been keeping a food journal and I wrote down what I remember drinking and it was WAY too much. I've been trying to not fall into the temptation to drink but it is so hard. I've been reading a lot on different blogs about drinking and weight loss and I've gotten some really good ideas. Two ideas I really liked (which maybe seem obvious but not for me) sip your drinks very slowly and the other is order drinks you really don't like very much so you drink it a lot slower and a lot less of it. I will have to try that. If I start drinking beer that's totally the end of it.